The Perfect Gift for Anyone who has Everything
"The Perfect Gift Policy for Anyone Who Thinks They Have Everything Covered"
Available Exclusively
The Saint Lawrence Agency
319 The Hermits Trail
Altamonte Springs, Fl 32701

The Texas I.Q. Test*

a) do you have a sense of humor?
b) do you take this coverage seriously?
c) were your parents related before they were married?

( if you answer yes more than once - you do not qualify)

Single Lifetime Premium
Same Day
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In 1987 we formed The UFO Abduction Insurance Company
a.k.a. The Alien Abduction Insurance Co. 
We were the First to offer this unique Coverage.
"We accept all Pre-existing Conditions -
You cannot be turned down-
regardless of Your Age or Frequent Flyer Status*"

"Beam Me Up...I'm Covered"
As Seen in
Guinness World Records
"Don't Leave Earth...Without It"
As Seen in "Contact"circa 1997
1999 Tampa Fox Interview
You Can't Get It...If You Don't Get It!

Includes Gold Bordered Policy, Claim Form
& Frequent Flyer Endorsement.
Same Day Email Delivery

Copyright 1987 - 2017 Mike St. Lawrence
BNN: The Breaking News Network...This Just In...Nothing Happened!

Introducing our newest product...

30th Anniversary Special
Buy One Policy...
Get One Free

This Offer Expires on 10/31/2017
Single Lifetime Premium
The Anonymous Alien